Diana

Summary:

Disruptive behaviour in the name of emotional self-harm

Diana

MaliceAforethought 19 Aug 2019 15:53

Logging on behalf of both Niles and Taylor, the latter of whom did an incredibly good job of handling a very difficult situation.

+ Show log

4:32 PM <Diana> Anyone want to see the nasty shit my friend just said about me on her vent account
4:32 PM <@AbsentmindedNihilist> i intended clb to be more of a wingman but it turned out to be bloody mary
4:32 PM <@AbsentmindedNihilist> who knew
4:32 PM <Diana> https://usercontent.irccloud-cdn.com/file/Bv4ZDOCk/IMG_4506.PNG
4:33 PM <naepicfael> you're still in high school, right?
4:33 PM <Diana> I’m trying to get her to hate me so if y’all could do me a favor and tell me what’ll make you hate me it would be appreciated
4:33 PM <Diana> Yes I am
4:33 PM <naepicfael> christ, maybe it's cause i was in a school of 6000 kids, but i never saw shit like this
4:34 PM <Diana> I’m an upperclassman but still in highschool
4:34 PM <@AbsentmindedNihilist> …why are you trying to get her to hate you?
4:34 PM <naepicfael> Diana, seriously, what hapened
4:34 PM <Diana> Because I deserve it
4:34 PM <@AbsentmindedNihilist> no
4:34 PM <Diana> I’m an awful person and all my friends should hate me
4:34 PM <@AbsentmindedNihilist> none of that here
4:35 PM <@AbsentmindedNihilist> that is bullshit.
4:35 PM <Diana> I mean I upset her unintentionally so why not do it on purpose if it’s just gonna happen anyways
4:35 PM <BlackWing> :|
4:35 PM <@AbsentmindedNihilist> don't
4:35 PM <Diana> She claims she’s my friend but I need to make sure she isn’t so she’ll quit pretending she does
4:35 PM <@AbsentmindedNihilist> okay i
4:36 PM <@AbsentmindedNihilist> i do not know how to improve your situation right now.
4:36 PM <Diana> Yeah I’m not thinking rationally you should probably kick me it would upset me immensely and I need that rn
4:36 PM <@AbsentmindedNihilist> but this is deeply upsetting to the rest of chat
4:36 PM <Diana> You guys don’t need to help me, I’ll stop
4:36 PM <@AbsentmindedNihilist> i'm not going to kick you, but i need you to stop this right fucking now.
4:36 PM <Diana> I guess I’m just trying to get myself kicked
4:36 PM <@AbsentmindedNihilist> thank you.
4:36 PM <Diana> Like I’m doing it on purpose :,) goddamnit
4:36 PM <@AbsentmindedNihilist> look.
4:37 PM <Diana> At least it worked, you hate me now
4:37 PM <@AbsentmindedNihilist> i care about you.
4:37 PM <Diana> Or at least you should
4:37 PM <@AbsentmindedNihilist> but i also care about the rest of this chat.
4:37 PM <naepicfael> Diana, come with me to #ethicscommittee
4:37 PM <Diana> Ok
4:37 PM ⇐ BlackWing quit (~BlackWing@D5C673C2:A03AE3FC:E89A0F56:IP) Quit: jumps out of window
4:37 PM <@AbsentmindedNihilist> thanks naepic
4:37 PM <naepicfael> np
4:37 PM <Diana> I have problems
4:38 PM <%taylor_work> Diana: hey so
4:38 PM <%taylor_work> A lot of us struggle with stuff like that - a lot of us have self confidence issues and low self esteem and a ton of us flat out have pretty severe depression
4:38 PM <%taylor_work> However
4:39 PM <%taylor_work> 19 is a general chat room that has many young people in it - as young as 15 that we allow
4:39 PM <%taylor_work> And while I and many others sympathize with you, 19 is not the place for that kind of behavior
4:39 PM <%taylor_work> We have ethics committee for venting and if you are in distress please seek professional help
4:40 PM <Diana> Yeah I know that’s why I’m doing it here I’m doing stuff that will upset me it’s a form of self harm
4:40 PM <Diana> I’m trying to ruin everything I have but let’s just drop it now
4:40 PM <%taylor_work> And I’m telling you to not do it here
4:40 PM <%taylor_work> Let me make it clear
4:40 PM <%taylor_work> I sympathize with you and I can provide you resources to seek help
4:41 PM <%taylor_work> But if you continue this kind of behavior in 19 you’ll essentially be forcing the op team’s hand in removing you
4:41 PM <%taylor_work> Ok?
4:41 PM <%taylor_work> If you need to talk I suggest 7cupsoftea.com
4:41 PM <Diana> Okay. What I was trying didn’t work so I guess I’ll stop now
4:41 PM <%taylor_work> Good.
4:41 PM <%taylor_work> Let’s move on.

Re: Diana

OccultistMave 19 Aug 2019 16:11

I do want to note that this isn't the first time that they have talked about self harm in 19.

Re: Diana

ProcyonLotor 19 Aug 2019 16:23

I would like to forward a long removal if this behavior should ever recur again in 19. Even if it's a symptom of a legitimate emotional problem, which I have no reason to doubt is the case, forcing the rest of 19 to have to handle it is unacceptable and borders on cruel.

Re: Diana

AbsentmindedNihilist 19 Aug 2019 16:24

I agree completely. I sympathize with the cause, that does not mean I have to tolerate the behavior.

Re: Diana

(account deleted) 19 Aug 2019 16:30

Noted, and agreed.

Re: Diana

(account deleted) 19 Aug 2019 17:25

Anyone want to see the nasty shit my friend just said about me on her vent account

For future reference, OPs and halfops can just shut someone down immediately at that point. Even if there are people present who do want to see the nasty shit, that's better suited to almost literally anywhere but our channels.

(I don't think this issue was mishandled, it appeared to move a little quickly for people to do that this time.)

Also, agreeing with Procy.

Re: Diana

OccultistMave 07 Sep 2019 02:32

Started having a break down in 19 about their record, ops decided on a week long for their own good.

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<DianaBerry> Welp
9:20 PM
<Waxx> river i'll give you one more chance
9:20 PM you're gonna have to do better than that one
9:20 PM <DianaBerry> So my record isn’t clean I have a fucking thread on o5 command
9:20 PM
<Waxx> rip
9:20 PM
<Modern_Erasmus> Who doesn't
9:20 PM
<BlackWing> MacMobile, Ah, you had the Foundation rescuing someone that was caught in a time travel experiment. Figured a bad joke would be kinda funny.
9:20 PM <DianaBerry> If people see that will it mean they won’t want to associate with me?
9:20 PM
<Dyslexion> Mac did you see my comment
9:20 PM <rattles> DianaBerry: i doubt it
9:20 PM
<MacMobile> Dyslexion: have you read my writing W/R/T war in general and WWII specifically?
9:21 PM
<Waxx> for $100 i'll delete it
9:21 PM <rattles> kaktus has an o5 record, so do lot of other solid folks
9:21 PM
<Dyslexion> I don't think I have
9:21 PM
<MacMobile> BlackWing: there might be puns
9:21 PM
<Dyslexion> What's an O5 record
9:21 PM <•AbsentmindedNihilist> DianaBerry: you'll be fine
9:21 PM
<River> Well, I could put some real effort in and waxx poetic, but I just can't candle that right now, I'm ear to relax
9:21 PM <•AbsentmindedNihilist> i have an 05 record and i'm chatstaff anyway
9:21 PM don't worry about it
9:21 PM <rattles> Dyslexion: BEHOLD O5 http://05command.wikidot.com/
9:21 PM <•taylor_iOStkin> waxx!
9:21 PM
<Waxx> alright okay i'll let that slide, i like that
9:22 PM hey taylor
9:22 PM <DianaBerry> The literally want to cry
9:22 PM
<Waxx> did you just release an album
9:22 PM
<BlackWing> Mew-ltiverse, Back on your thing: It's not "not trying", it's "take a break on trying to think of an idea and write something unrelated"
9:22 PM
<MacMobile> Dyslexion: I want to read Maus just because. I'm big on being sensitive even when I'm being edgy
9:22 PM <TheMightyMcB> DianaBerry: it's no big deal, lots of users have one
9:22 PM
<River> (For the record, you might or might not remember me as Kestin, during a time when I probably mde many better jokes)
9:22 PM ⇐ tawny quit (noom.eht.fo.esir.eht.erofeb.tesnus|ynwat#noom.eht.fo.esir.eht.erofeb.tesnus|ynwat) Ping timeout: 188 seconds
9:22 PM
<River> Yay, approval :)
9:22 PM <•taylor_iOStkin> no, I released an EP almost a year ago
9:22 PM <DianaBerry> Just seeing people talk about a possible ban of me because of my feelings is a lot for me
9:22 PM <•AbsentmindedNihilist> DianaBerry: it's really not a big deal. a lot of people get one, never do anything again, and it gets ignored.
9:22 PM <DianaBerry> It’s a big deal to me
9:22 PM <•taylor_iOStkin> But I have a single that I just released for pre-order!
9:22 PM
<Waxx> that's what i saw
9:22 PM <TheMightyMcB> Hell, Crashington had one for giving bad criticism
9:22 PM <DianaBerry> I know but I know it’s there
9:22 PM
<Waxx> i couldn't recall if it was a single or an album
9:22 PM <•AbsentmindedNihilist> you can't let this get to you.
9:22 PM
<Waxx> congratulations
9:22 PM
<River> DianaBerry: I know how you feel. If I ever saw my name up there I'd get anxiety even if it was a tiny thing
9:22 PM <•taylor_iOStkin> DianaBerry: let me make this simple then
9:22 PM
<MacMobile> I have an o5
9:22 PM <DianaBerry> I read the comments, I read what people said
9:23 PM
<•CorvusCaurinus> Link me taylor
9:23 PM
<MacMobile> Bruh
9:23 PM I got banned
9:23 PM <•taylor_iOStkin> DianaBerry: it's really, really not a big deal. Almost everyone has one. However
9:23 PM
<MacMobile> .seen zyn
9:23 PM
<•Secretary_Helen> I last saw zyn 7 days ago saying: have a good night everyone
9:23 PM <TheMightyMcB> Literally a butterfly had it tossed around if they should have a c&d
9:23 PM
<Waxx> River i do seem to remember that name
9:23 PM
<River> Cause I mean, it's public. People (including me) go there to rubberneck.
9:23 PM
<MacMobile> .seen Soulless
9:23 PM
<•Secretary_Helen> I last saw Soulless 28 minutes ago saying: :(
9:23 PM
<Simartar> Really? Almost everyone?
9:23 PM <TheMightyMcB> It happens
9:23 PM <•taylor_iOStkin> continuing to do this in 19 is gonna force our hand, and I've told you this.
9:23 PM
<•CorvusCaurinus> DianaBerry: then you should know we don't want you freaking out in 19 like this
9:23 PM <•taylor_iOStkin> Simartar: like. A lot of people.
9:23 PM
<Simartar> Sorry I was just surprised by that figure
9:23 PM <DianaBerry> Ah sorry
9:23 PM
<Modern_Erasmus> Literally everyone who is a long term community member winds up getting one eventually
9:23 PM <•taylor_iOStkin> CorvusCaurinus: you can preorder it on iTunes!
9:23 PM Waxx: Thank you :D
9:23 PM It's my best work yet I feel
9:23 PM
<•CorvusCaurinus> Can I preorder it somewhere that isn't there
9:23 PM <DianaBerry> I just really don’t have anyone else to talk to
9:23 PM
<Waxx> i like to see people doing well
9:23 PM
<Dyslexion> I'm gonna do my best to not get an O5 record
9:24 PM <•taylor_iOStkin> (I'm actually working on a song rn that Peppers and I are using for a skip)
9:24 PM
<Waxx> i never got an O5 record
9:24 PM amazingly enough
9:24 PM
<MacMobile> Soulless: if your online and your memory is serving you well, tell these fine folks about my shenanigans
9:24 PM <•AbsentmindedNihilist> DianaBerry: friend, you gotta get out there then
9:24 PM <•taylor_iOStkin> CorvusCaurinus: pretty much anywhere that lets you actually purchase music
9:24 PM <•AbsentmindedNihilist> we can't be your only friends
9:24 PM <TheMightyMcB> I currently don't have one but I'm a shitbag and a half so
9:24 PM God knows how I escaped it
9:24 PM <rattles> isn't there a a vent channel? ethicscommittee?
9:24 PM
<•CorvusCaurinus> You got a bandcamp/soundcloud?
9:24 PM → Bouncl joined (~ten.xoc.cd.cd.6911FEB6-CRInys|yllaeron#ten.xoc.cd.cd.6911FEB6-CRInys|yllaeron)
9:24 PM <•AbsentmindedNihilist> i know that might seem difficult,
9:24 PM but you've got to do it.
9:24 PM <DianaBerry> Welp guess I shouldn’t care about my record anymore being on there makes me feel like a criminal
9:24 PM
<Dyslexion> I'm dumb as hell and I run my mouth
9:24 PM <•taylor_iOStkin> CorvusCaurinus: it's currently on private on soundcloud cuz it doesn't go live till the 18th however
9:24 PM <rattles> #ethicscommittee
9:25 PM <•taylor_iOStkin> CorvusCaurinus: because ur Cool and Fun if you wanna hear it I'll show u
9:25 PM <DianaBerry> No one ever goes to ethics committee
9:25 PM <•AbsentmindedNihilist> DianaBerry: look, i'm trying to be gentle about this, but you're doing the exact thing we wrote you up for,
9:25 PM
— River immedaitely goes to dig through O5 to check Waxx's claim
9:25 PM
<BlackWing> https://scontent-ort2-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/68925884_2095114740797463_396768241285857280_n.jpg?_nc_cat=104&_nc_oc=AQkQXdPi4OTl7qYojDg2lLU9_3gAl5qMxoSuPEZVMbBkBYLAHohASOvsJVY45rPox5v8rZ1p-eziVSq7HmzzQvqy&_nc_ht=scontent-ort2-1.xx&oh=0577d2cc1377f5cf6509a0bd7b91e8e6&oe=5E05FC5A
9:25 PM <DianaBerry> Oh my god I am
9:25 PM Goddamn it give me a few minutes to clear my head
9:25 PM ← DianaBerry left (dellacer.neeb.sah.anaid|861373diu#dellacer.neeb.sah.anaid|861373diu)

Came by 17 to appeal.

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<DianaBerry> Hi uh…no surprised what I’m banned for I’m so sorry unlike last time I swear I wasn’t trying to cause a scene.
9:30 PM ⇐ Kufat quit (~PI.BC557B54.291779A2.576D96DF|tafuk#PI.BC557B54.291779A2.576D96DF|tafuk) Ping timeout: 184 seconds
9:31 PM <•taylor_iOStkin> You were banned because at this time we do not believe you're able to participate in 19 in a manner healthy for yourself or for 19.
9:31 PM Your ban, however, is only 1 week.
9:32 PM <DianaBerry> a week
9:32 PM ?
9:32 PM <•taylor_iOStkin> Please, Diana, talk to someone.
9:32 PM Yeah, a week.
9:32 PM <DianaBerry> I can get over this in a day
9:32 PM <•taylor_iOStkin> Well, the ban is a week.
9:32 PM ⇐ •Crashington quit (egap.rohtua.ym.daer|362453diu#egap.rohtua.ym.daer|362453diu) Quit: Connection closed for inactivity
9:32 PM <DianaBerry> I can’t go a whole week
9:32 PM → RadioactiveRADs joined (~PI.A6D4868B.0F453639.60EF0362|criigc#PI.A6D4868B.0F453639.60EF0362|criigc)
9:33 PM <•taylor_iOStkin> The fact that you say 'I can't go a week without being in 19' really only solidifies my view that you really should go at least a week without 19.
9:33 PM However, if you'd like to appeal your ban, I can wrangle someone.
9:33 PM <DianaBerry> I just was having an episode they don’t last that long. I’m really sorry.
9:33 PM I mean I could literally go a week, I spent most of this week off
9:33 PM <•taylor_iOStkin> Again, if you want to appeal, I can't take it.
9:33 PM <DianaBerry> But the thought of being banned for a week just hurts me
9:33 PM <•taylor_iOStkin> I'm not a full operator in 19 yet.
9:34 PM <DianaBerry> I’m not sure who the full operators are
9:34 PM I just wish I could explain better
9:34 PM <•AbsentmindedNihilist> hello
9:34 PM i can take this appeal
9:34 PM <DianaBerry> I mean Mew is gonna talk about that chat and how everything is funny and awesome and I just don’t know if I can deal with not being able to experience it
9:35 PM → DrChandra joined (ac.kniltsae.020853EE-CRInys|tibbiM#ac.kniltsae.020853EE-CRInys|tibbiM)
9:35 PM <•AbsentmindedNihilist> DianaBerry: that, to be perfectly honest, isn't our problem
9:35 PM <DianaBerry> Look I know I don’t deserve an appeal. I wish I could explain this better. I guess is just strange to me that my warped mind view is well…warped
9:35 PM I know it’s not
9:36 PM I don’t have people irl to talk to. I just…it’s hard for me to get over
9:36 PM <•AbsentmindedNihilist> look, i care about you, diana. i just have to make the decision to do what's best for chat, and i don't think it's healthy for you or chat when you feel and act this way.
9:37 PM <DianaBerry> I have really bad self esteem issues as we all know
9:37 PM <•AbsentmindedNihilist> take this as an opportunity to reach out to irl people, or other communities.
9:37 PM <DianaBerry> I could probably deal with this if Mew wasn’t a constant reminder
9:37 PM But this is going to be logged and people will see it and hate me. I know I get off feelings from people who have been on the ban page
9:38 PM <Mew-ltiverse> please don't drag me into this
9:38 PM that's all I'm going to say
9:38 PM <•AbsentmindedNihilist> okay. do you have any other reasons you think you should be unbanned?
9:38 PM → comptech joined (~PI.C10F6934.1A22A566.4393824E|nimda#PI.C10F6934.1A22A566.4393824E|nimda)
9:38 PM <•AbsentmindedNihilist> bc we can't allow banned users to hang around in 17/.
9:38 PM <DianaBerry> I just came back after mostly skipping the week aaahhhh. I’m sorry I justttt
9:38 PM I’ll leave soon I promise
9:39 PM Basically, I’m generally able to have a good handle on myself. I had been doing really well.
9:39 PM
<•CorvusCaurinus> With all due respect
9:39 PM <•AbsentmindedNihilist> DianaBerry: and yet you're here begging us to let you back in, which is why we think you're going to have to be banned.
9:39 PM
<•CorvusCaurinus> I do not think you have as good a handle on yourself as you seem to believe
9:39 PM <DianaBerry> These episodes never last long, and with this ban hanging over my head I just feel it’s gonna hurt me more
9:40 PM My apologies, I didn’t realize it looked like I was begging
9:40 PM
<•CorvusCaurinus> It's not how long they last but that they happen at all, period.
9:40 PM <•AbsentmindedNihilist> DianaBerry: it's not our job to be mental health counselors. we can't handle it when you break down.
9:40 PM <DianaBerry> I don’t think I deserve to be back in right now
9:40 PM
<•CorvusCaurinus> Length is COMPLETELY irrelevant.
9:40 PM <DianaBerry> I just wanted to explain my actions
9:40 PM <•AbsentmindedNihilist> i understand. now, i'm sorry, but i'm going to have to ask you to leave.
9:40 PM <DianaBerry> I’ll leave in a minute just like…you won’t think any different of me because this happened?
9:41 PM ← comptech left (~PI.C10F6934.1A22A566.4393824E|nimda#PI.C10F6934.1A22A566.4393824E|nimda)
9:41 PM <•AbsentmindedNihilist> DianaBerry: if you want to talk to me further, pm me. this isn't a conversation that should be had publicaly.
9:41 PM <DianaBerry> I will, night.

Appeal denied.

Last edited on 07 Sep 2019 02:43 by OccultistMave Show more

Re: Diana

ProcyonLotor 01 Oct 2019 02:23

A sensitive issue came up and it turned into a trash fire, to put it lightly. As such, Diana is being banned for a period of one month for reasons of emotional maturity. An appeal remains available to her.

Due to the general personal nature of the incident in question, logs are not being posted to 05. They remain available to chatstaff.

Additionally, Diana has been informed that any future incident necessitating chatstaff intervention in her sisterly relationship with Mew-ltiverse is grounds for an immediate permaban at chatstaff's discretion.

Re: Diana

LilyFlower 12 Oct 2019 10:13

Noting that Diana attempted an appeal, which was denied.

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~🌸~Flower Power~🌸~