http://www.scp-wiki.net/log-of-anomalous-items/comments/show
Item Description: A Alienware laptop. Noticed to have a "infinite" storage space. Number of space reads "Infinite
Date of Recovery:2017-10-12
Location of Recovery:Raid on a said Insurgent holdout, found in the holdout armory
Current status: In possession of Dr. Church in his personal quarters
Notes: Whoever put ████ ███████ of pornography on my new computer is gonna get a [DATA EXPUNGED] and a lower paycheck!- Dr. Church
Item Description: A female researcher of ██ age, that will always sneeze whenever in direct sight with any Keter Class object.
Date of Recovery: 20██-█-█
Location of Recovery: Ability found during testing at Site-19
Current Statues: Stationed at Site-19
Notes: I don't care I've been put in the anomalous category, I'm don't always sneeze when in direct contact with a Keter!- Dr. Catherine
Notes(2): After further testing, we have confirmed that Catherine sneezes when in direct contact with any Anomalies.- Dr. Church
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http://www.scp-wiki.net/log-of-unexplained-locations/p/999#82
Location Description: Location is a former United States National Guard armory around 20x20 meters in width. When any gun with 5.56, .308, .38, or .45 ammo enters the area, the clip is refilled and automatically begins firing, regardless of wheter clip is loaded or if the safety is on. Clips seems to reload itself and takes approximately 24.5 seconds to refill.
Date of Containment: ████-██-██
Location: Appalachian Mountians, USA
Security Protocol: Area is designated abandoned and guards are to patrol the outside of the area. Under no circumstances are any guns allowed inside the facility. Inside of facility is to be used as guard's quaterers.
Note: I've seen some weird shit but this? Just why? What supernatural being would go out of their way to create this? -Dr. Church
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http://www.scp-wiki.net/experiment-log-t-98816-oc108-682
Item: SCP-1437
Tissue Test Record: Tissue was dropped in without problem
Termination Test Record:
SCP-682 was subdued and brought to Area-██, which was the area SCP-1437 is at. When dropped down SCP-1437, SCP-682 did not come back up, assuming 682 was presumed terminated. However, 2 hours and 12 minutes later, SCP-682 flew out of the hole at 40-50 miles per hour. Subject then started rampaging through the site. Mobile Task Force Nu-7 (Hammer Down), was called in to subdue SCP-682
Notes: Whoever put in this test in my name is going to be seriously reprimanded! You could've just asked before dropping a fucking unkillable lizard down a hole!- Dr. Church
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Date: ██/██/████
Test Subject: 1 broken car engine
Procedure: One litter of SCP-447 was poured over the car engine to refurbish it.
Results: Engine was started and was functioning. Said engine was said to have a minty scent to it.
Notes: "Well at least my car's engine works now. But say there was a car crash and I died. Well we can't have it come into contact with a dead me." - Dr. Church
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http://www.scp-wiki.net/experiment-log-447-a
Date: ██/██/████
Test Subject: Dr. Church
Procedure: While Dr. Church was walking into his dormitory, 3 litters of SCP-447 were to be dumped on him.
Results: Dr. Church, yelled at the personnel involved in the expiriment and said he would "Fucking kill them". Subject then proceeded to grab a gun and told everyone to "Back the fuck off".
Notes: If any of you try this again, I'll personally stab you in the gut. Now I know how Clef felt. - Dr. Church
Notes (2): Dr. Church has been sent to a mandatory 3 month anger management class. He will resume work in the next two weeks, taking the class every other Wednesday.
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http://www.scp-wiki.net/experiment-log-914
Name:Dr. Church
Date:██/██/20██
Total items: 2 miniature figures from the genre Warhammer 40.
Input: One Imperial Guardsman
Setting: Rough
Total items: 1x inanimate Chaos Cultist
Input: One Basilsk with two Imperial Guardsman manning the artillery
Setting: Fine
Total items: One working miniature basilsk and two miniature guardsmen. Subjects were confused and dazed, but later started walking around and were capable of English speech.
Notes from Dr. Church: Yes I know I did this just because I like the genre and games, but the two Guardsmen are adapting well to the space I created for them on my desk. The artillery was also capable of firing shells that were attached to it. The basilisk is to be kept in the storage facility, and Special containment procedure for the two currently don't require special containment procedures.